IT'S ALL ABOUT POSITION

Teacher:  Class, what's wrong with this sentence:  I think you're great; so where do you want to do it at?
Student:  You ended the sentence with a preposition.
Teacher:  What should you say?
Student:  I think you're great; so where do you want to do it, your place or mine?
Another student:  You're still ending the sentence in a proposition!

SPACEY

Blonde astronaut returns after fifty years in space and is filling out an application.

NAME:  Gloria Jones
DATE:  Yes
SEX:  Sometimes
          MALE_____FEMALE_____
EMAIL___________________  I'm sorry, but the world seems to have gotten really complicated since I was last here.

NOT SO GAY

Interviewer:  What do you think about same-sex marriages?
Lady:  We have a same-sex marriage.
Interviewer:  You're married to a woman?
Lady:  No!  Our sex is the same every time.

UNFAIR MAIDEN

Why did Heather always make better marks than Kevin?  The teacher graded on the curves.

COSMETIC ANSWER

One: What kind of evidence was found on her clothes--and keep in mind there are children present here.

Other: Uh, ok, let's say Oil of a Lay.

NOT TONIGHT . . .

Adam was asked what Eve used when she had a headache. "A leaf," Adam divulged.